What To Send When Someone Dies Instead of Flowers: 11+ Sympathy Gift Ideas

Losing a loved one is a deeply personal experience. While flowers are a traditional gesture, there are countless ways to express your condolences in a more meaningful manner.

Choose one of these sympathy gifts when you’re unsure what to send when someone dies instead of flowers. These thoughtful alternatives are a great way to offer comfort, support and a lasting tribute to a lost loved one. 

Food and drink

It’s common for grieving people to lose their appetite and energy to cook a meal. In times of grief, the simple act of nourishment can provide comfort. 

Food and drink gifts offer a tangible expression of care and support, providing relief and convenience to those struggling to cope. Here are some food and drink ideas if you’re unsure what to send when someone dies instead of flowers.

• Gourmet gift baskets: Gift baskets combine a variety of delicious treats in one convenient package. Options include a basket filled with gourmet cheeses, chocolates and crackers, or a variety of artisanal jams, preserves and teas.
• Meal and grocery delivery services: These services provide a practical solution for those who may be overwhelmed by cooking or simply lack an appetite. By delivering prepared meals directly to their doorstep, these services alleviate the stress of meal planning and preparation, allowing grieving individuals to focus on healing. You can also set up a meal train system to deliver meals to those grieving.

Charitable donation

Charitable donations offer a touching way to honor the memory of a loved one. By contributing to a cause that was important to the deceased, you can help carry on their legacy and make a difference in the lives of others.

When choosing a charity, consider the deceased’s interests, passions or values. For example, if they were an avid animal lover, you could donate to a local animal shelter or wildlife conservation organization. Or, if they had a particular religious or spiritual affiliation, you could donate to a related charity.

To make a donation on behalf of the deceased, simply contact the charity directly and provide their name. Many charities allow you to create a memorial page in their honor, where you can share memories and encourage others to donate.

Personalized jewelry

Personalized jewelry is a tangible and enduring way to honor the memory of a loved one if you’re unsure what to send when someone dies instead of flowers. By incorporating elements that reflect the deceased’s life or the recipient’s interests, you can create a truly meaningful and heartfelt gift.

Custom-made necklaces or bracelets can feature specific symbols, initials or quotes that hold significance for both the giver and the recipient. Engraved rings or pendants can also be personalized with significant messages or dates.

Personalized charms or keepsakes also are a versatile option that can be added to existing jewelry or worn on their own. Consider incorporating elements such as birthstones, fingerprints or even a small piece of the deceased’s favorite fabric.

Photos and art

Photos and art can evoke powerful emotions and serve as lasting reminders of cherished memories in lieu of flowers. A carefully chosen piece can offer peace and a sense of connection to the deceased.

Framed photos are a classic choice that surviving family members or friends can display in their homes as a constant reminder of the lost loved one. Select a photo that captures a special moment or a favorite activity. 

Digital photo albums or videos offer a modern way to preserve and share memories. You can customize them with personal messages, music and effects to create a unique and meaningful tribute.

For a truly personalized touch, consider a custom-made piece of art. An artist can create a unique portrait, painting or sculpture that captures the personality and essence of the deceased. 

Grief journal or book

A grief journal or book can provide a safe and supportive space to process emotions, reflect on memories and find healing. Journaling can help individuals explore their feelings, express their thoughts and gain a better understanding of their grief journey. These journals often include prompts and exercises that can help people navigate the complexities of grief. 

Inspirational books about grief and loss can offer guidance and hope. These books can provide valuable insights, coping strategies and a sense of connection to others who have experienced similar losses.

Memorial guest book

Guest books are a nice option if you’re looking for memorial gifts. Gifting a memorial guest book serves as a tangible reminder of the love and support that surrounds those who are grieving. By collecting messages, memories and well wishes, a guest book can provide consolation for years to come.

Physical guest books offer a personalized way to preserve memories, featuring beautiful designs and even photos. Guests can write heartfelt messages, share anecdotes and express their condolences in a tangible way.

Online guest books provide an accessible option for those unable to attend a memorial service in person. They can also be easily shared with family and friends, allowing everyone to participate in honoring the deceased’s memory.

Gift of service

In times of grief, gifting your time can be invaluable. Offering a gift of service demonstrates your willingness to lend a helping hand and alleviate some of the burdens that come with loss.

Consider offering to help with chores or errands. This could involve tasks such as scheduling or funding grocery delivery through Instacart, helping with laundry or tackling yard work. By taking care of these day-to-day responsibilities, you can provide much-needed relief for the bereaved.

If the deceased had children or pets, providing child care or pet care can be a significant gesture of support. This allows the grieving individuals to focus on their emotions and take time for themselves.

You can also volunteer in the deceased’s memory –– this is another meaningful way to honor their legacy and make a positive impact. Research organizations or causes that were important to the deceased and offer to volunteer your time. This can be a rewarding experience that brings comfort and purpose during a difficult time.

Self-care gifts

During times of grief, it’s essential to take care of your physical and mental well-being as you cope with the emotional challenges of loss. Self-care gifts provide support and encourage grieving individuals to prioritize their own needs. You can mix and match self-care gifts and build creative gift baskets.

Here are a few self-care gift ideas:

• Spa gift certificates provide a relaxing escape from the stresses of daily life. Book a massage, facial or other spa treatment to reduce stress, promote relaxation and improve overall well-being.
• Subscription boxes for wellness products offer a convenient way to discover new and innovative self-care items. These boxes may include items such as essential oils, bath bombs or meditation tools. By subscribing to a wellness box, individuals can receive regular reminders to prioritize their self-care during difficult times.
• Books or courses on mindfulness and meditation provide valuable tools for managing stress and promoting emotional well-being. These resources can teach individuals how to calm their minds, reduce anxiety and create a sense of peace.

Grab it now on Instacart:

Chocolates

Stuffed animals

Balloons

Books

Magazines

Coloring books

Self-care items

Coffee

Candy

Snacks

Puzzles

Memorial candles

Memorial candles are a safe option if you’re unsure what to send when someone dies instead of flowers. Candles have long been associated with rituals of remembrance and mourning. Their flickering flame symbolizes the eternal spirit and serves as a comforting light during times of loss.

• Scented candles can offer a soothing experience. Aromas such as lavender, vanilla or sandalwood can evoke feelings of peace and tranquility, providing consolation and reassurance.
• Personalized candles can add a unique and meaningful touch. Consider candles with engraved messages, photos or symbols that represent the deceased. These personalized candles serve as a constant reminder of their presence and the love they shared.

Weighted blanket

Weighted blankets have gained popularity in recent years for their ability to promote relaxation and reduce stress. The gentle pressure they exert on the body can help to regulate the nervous system and induce a sense of calm.

For individuals experiencing grief, weighted blankets can provide a physical source of relief and security. The weight can help ground the body and mind and reduce feelings of anxiety and restlessness. The sensation of being wrapped in a warm blanket can also evoke feelings of safety and protection, and provide a sense of reassurance during difficult times. Better yet, send some tea for the recipient to sip on while wrapped in their blanket.

Handwritten sympathy card

The simple gift of a handwritten card is one of the best ideas when you’re unsure what to send when someone dies instead of flowers. A heartfelt message written by hand conveys a level of sincerity and thoughtfulness that is difficult to replicate.

When writing a sympathy card, it’s important to express your condolences in a genuine and compassionate manner. Begin by acknowledging the loss and offering your heartfelt sympathies. You can also share a personal memory of the deceased or a quality you admire about them.

Keep your message simple and sincere. A few well-chosen words can offer consolation and reassurance to the grieving family. Remember, the most important thing is to write from the heart. The recipient is sure to cherish a heartfelt and genuine handwritten card long after the initial shock of grief has subsided.

A plant or tree

Plants and trees have long been associated with life, growth and renewal. As enduring symbols of hope and resilience, they can serve as powerful memorials of a loved one.

• A memorial tree planting offers a tangible way to honor the memory of those no longer with you. By planting a tree in their name, you are creating a living legacy that will continue to grow and flourish for generations to come. 
• Potted plants or succulents can be a meaningful choice for those who prefer a more immediate and personal connection. These living gifts can be displayed in a home or garden, serving as a constant reminder of the loved one.

Shop for sympathy gifts through Instacart

Choosing the perfect gift to express condolences can be challenging, especially if you’re unsure what to send when someone dies instead of flowers. That’s where Instacart comes in. 

You can shop a range of sympathy gifts through Instacart –– we make it easy to send a meaningful gift to the bereaved. From personalized photo frames to gourmet food baskets, you’ll find a variety of options to comfort those in mourning.

Simply browse our selection of sympathy gifts, select your preferred items and schedule delivery. With Instacart’s convenient service, you can send a thoughtful gift quickly and easily, providing consolation and support to those in need.

Not sure how to make a gift basket? Check out our latest article to create a personalized gift basket for your loved ones.

Cady Cohen

Author

Cady Cohen is a culinary writer at Instacart who empowers home cooks to navigate the exciting world of food with confidence. She has worked in digital media for over seven years covering food, health, and wellness. From handy conversion charts and recipe calculators to in-depth cooking guides, Cady's work makes grocery shopping a breeze and empowers you to make informed choices about what you put on your plate.

Heather Matley

Editor

Heather Matley is an editor at Instacart whose passion for food and cooking has inspired her work on everything from grocery guides to recipe development. With over eight years of experience in editing, content creation, and search engine optimization, she strives to empower readers with the most effective tools, guides, and ideas to transform their home cooking.